Intimate Partner Violence, also called Dating or Domestic Violence or Relationship Abuse is a pattern of abusive and coercive behaviors used to maintain power and control over a former or current intimate partner. Abuse can be emotional, financial, sexual or physical and can include threats, isolation, and intimidation. Intimate Partner Violence does not always involve physical violence but the abuse often escalates over time. 

It is not your fault

If your partner is abusing you, you may feel confused, afraid, angry and/or trapped. All of these emotions are normal responses to abuse. You may also blame yourself for what is happening. You are never responsible for your partner’s abusive actions. Intimate Partner Violence is always a decision that someone makes to harm their partner. Intimate Partner Violence is not caused by alcohol or drugs, stress, anger management, or provocation. It is the perpetrator’s choice to be abusive.

• Do you feel nervous around your partner?
• Do you have to be careful to control your behavior to avoid your partner’s anger?
• Does your partner pressure you about sexual activity?
• Are you scared of disagreeing with your partner?
• Does your partner criticize or humiliate you in front of other people or belittle your accomplishments?
• Is your partner always checking up on you or questioning you about what you do without your partner?
• Does your partner monitor or control where you go or who you spend time with?
• Does your partner repeatedly and wrongfully accuse you of seeing or flirting with other people?
• Does your partner tell you that if you changed, they wouldn’t treat you like this?
• Does your partner blame you or other for their feelings and use these feelings to manipulate you? For example saying, "You make me mad" or "You're hurting me by not doing what I want you to do."
• Does your partner’s jealousy stop you from seeing friends or family?
• Has your partner abused or killed your pets?